Goneril rolled her eyes. "You find that out from talking to them," she replied, and then looked crossly at Faolin. "I'm holding you responsible for this, you know," she warned.

"She's the Queen," Faolin said dryly. "There is only so far one can push her before she starts threatening to exile you to the Highlands."

"I would not," said Fiona sharply. "I know how you feel about the Highlands." She gave Goneril a bleak look. "This isn't his fault," she said. "I was like this before him, too."

Goneril looked tempted to nudge Faolin with her elbow, but then remembered that it might actually be a physical strain for her to do so. Instead, she let out a sigh. "You know she wouldn't, really," she said, "and you," she said, looking sternly at Fiona, "ought to listen to him more, if he's tried to get you to do something about it. It's not...it's not hard. Every other person in the world can do it, and most of them aren't as smart or as clever as you are."

"Everyone else in the world is not a freak," she said bitterly--then shot a look at Goneril, alarmed and embarrassed.

Goneril gave her a sharp look. "You're not a freak, either," she said. "You have horns. Which are beautiful. And you're sick. Which plenty of people are."

"So I am a goat," she said, shrugging. "When goats are sickly, they treat them with pine resin. I don't think anyone's resorted to feeding me pine resin yet. Although I've never seen exactly what's in that blasted tea."

"Why are you being so sour about it?" Goneril replied. "Has anyone ever treated you like a goat? No." She glanced sidelong at Faolin. "Because you have people who love you and don't care about anything else. Do you think about how this makes them feel, when you start with this self-pitying nonsense?"

Faolin looked far too amused by the whole scenario. "Do you want to swap seats," he asked Goneril, "or is it better we keep someone between the two of you just now?"

"Oh, don't be smug," Fiona grouched. She gave a pleading look to Goneril. "You've been doing this your whole life. I've only been at it an hour. Just give me a bit longer to catch on? I'll improve."