Joined: Wed Oct 15, 2008 3:52 pm
Jochy and Niabheara (bodyswap), July 29 2008
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 03:35 PM
It always came back to the hair.
Elaine was definitely sick of it.
She sat with Niabheara's comb on Judith's bed, brushing it one, two...forty, forty-one...times, sighing to herself.
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 03:40 PM
"Elaine?" The voice was soft and quiet, holding none of its former tension. Even if he was fairly certain, Jochy had to ask, because you never knew when they might have turned back. But he didn't think that Nialla would have that particularly pained expression while brushing her hair.
"Do you have a moment? I need to talk to you." He thought he had quite a bit of control himself, he hoped she didn't pick up on how nervous he felt.
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 03:56 PM
The girl looked up and stopped brushing. "No, I'm too fascinated with brushing my hair to have any spare time for you," she teased, making a face up at the air. "Where'd you go? I was expecting you to come back."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 04:01 PM
"Yeah... about that." There was a moment of silence, then he decided he had better just go ahead and tell it like it was. "I didn't drop the mirror 'cause I was getting off, I dropped it because somebody touched me. Scared me enough to make me drop the damn thing." His voice was tight and controlled now. "It was the man I told you about before, the pirate. Apparently he had broken out of his chains, tracked me down and decided to have a bit of fun with me. He was pretty much naked."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 04:05 PM
Elaine blinked, and her expression went a bit blank. "Did you rip his balls off?" she asked him reasonably.
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 04:23 PM
The answer was a sigh. "I was... shocked? Surprised? I didn't know what to do, who the hell does things like that? I mean even I have standards... I told him to leave. He wouldn't. I tried to just ignore him. Give the cold shoulder you know but he seemed to take that as a challenge. When I shrugged him off, he got in the bath with me." Jochy's voice was tightly controlled now, sharp and brittle. "He's... he acts like an idiot, but he's anything but. I didn't even notice him getting into the room. When he touched me the first time, I tried to hurt him you know? No use. And when he was in the bath... I tried to push him back he grabbed me and..."
There was a faint crack there, in his voice. "I know how this sounds. But he got under my skin. Freaked me the hell out. Couldn't get away. He told me he'd let me go if I kissed him. I panicked. Drew a blank and did that. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 04:29 PM
"What?" Elaine demanded, her fists going tight. "Did you at least sock him in the jaw?" she asked. "Or bite his tongue? Jesus Christ, who the hell does that?"
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 04:37 PM
"Didn't have the chance. Was interrupted by yer father and Spider that had some news that apparently couldn't wait. And... I'm grateful. Bloody grateful. Because... I ain't sure I would have. I don't know how he did it, but he got to me. Got me to feel like I was a bloody kid all over again. Like I didn't have a choice. Like it was either that or snap and kill the bastard. If I could. Because that's part of why I didn't, I had that feeling that even if I did fight you know? I'd lose. And it'd be worse. I... Spider said he got off on the fear. That's what made him go after me. It damn well cured me of thinking he was hot anyway, I..." Jochy swallowed, not looking at the mirror as he kept the focus. "I hadn't felt that helpless in years. And not to a... normal man... hell, even the demon didn't make me freeze like that."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 04:41 PM
The girl gave him a rather suspicious look. "So, you're saying that if you hadn't gotten interrupted, you would have fucked him because he scared you?" she asked. "Jochy, that's just all messed up, you do know that. Are you apologizing to me because you kissed him, or are you apologizing to me because you wanted to fuck somebody else?"
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 04:47 PM
"No, I wouldn't have fucked him!" Jochy raised his voice there a bit, because he honestly didn't think he would have. "And I know it's fucked up. I'm bloody furious at myself, because I... I'm supposed to be better. I'm not supposed to be that... weak." The word was filled with disgust. "It was like my mind just... drew a blank. I couldn't think what to do, it just reverted to something I knew. Something familiar if horrible."
He was fighting hard to keep his emotions under control now. "I am apologizing 'cause I kissed him. And for thinking he was hot. But I told you that, I wasn't keeping it a secret. I didn't think he'd... DO something like that. And he disgusts me now. Hell, sex disgusts me now... I don't... I don't even... no." He broke off, unable to articulate what he meant.
Right now celibacy seemed like a good thing.
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 04:56 PM
"Jochy," Elaine said quietly, pressing her hands into the bedspread. "Jochy, that's like having someone put a knife to your throat and tell you they'll slit it if you don't steal something, and then apologizing for stealing. That's not being unfaithful," she pointed out. "It'd be worse if you led him on, if you tried to make him want you and never touched him. It's not--"
She sighed, looked up, wide-eyed and sincere. "Not even with me?"
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 05:05 PM
"I... I don't know. Maybe I did lead him on. Maybe... I... hell, people think I flirt with them all the time even when I don't. Or... maybe it's just what he said. That he liked the challenge. He... said, before, that one of the reasons he was on Refuge was because of rape... at least it was one out of a long list of things. I just... no means no, you know?" He swallowed hard there, because one of the reasons this sat so badly with him was that he had done the same himself.
Or rather, part of himself had.
"I didn't try to make him want me. I tried to make him go away. That at least I'm sure of. I... just didn't know I had it in me anymore. That fear."
He swallowed, pondering her last question for a moment. "It's academic, ennit? Yer not here." Diplomacy...
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 05:11 PM
"Well, fear only comes out when there's something to be scared of, Jochy," Elaine murmured. "Silly boy." She smiled softly at him. "And it's not leading him on if you're not doing it consciously."
She tossed her heavy red hair behind her back, put her hands over her belly, and flopped back onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling as if that's where he was. "Who cares if it's academic? I wouldn't be insulted if you said no. I just want to know how bad he got to you. If I were there, would you want me, or no?"
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 05:17 PM
"Not now." Jochy admitted this, a bit surprised himself. But it was true. "And yeah, I know I'm silly but this... I don't want to ruin this. Us. And I keep expecting I will. And I... he got me worse than I thought. I haven't felt helpless in a long bloody time. Even with the demon I -knew- why I did it. I made a choice, -I- sacrificed things... this here I had no control. Even when I tried to. Yer ever met someone who've tried to bully you with silk gloves? You don't really notice what they are doing until suddenly yer up against a wall and have done shit you never really wanted."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 05:30 PM
"Of course I have," Elaine answered, giving the air a wry look. "That's my grandfather, isn't it? Through and through, same kind of personality and everything. The slick, sneaky sort that makes you feel like you want to be doing things that would make your skin crawl if it was for anybody else, you know what I mean?"
She sighed sympathetically. "Just kick him next time, will you? He can't hurt you. After everything else you've been through, just...he can't, Jochy. He can't hurt you."
She raised an eyebrow. "Are you going to want me in, oh, about a month?"
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 05:34 PM
"Try telling my brain that. Just the thought that I'm gonna be on the same ship as him creeps me out. I know it's stupid but..." There was a verbal shrug there. "And I am fairly certain I will. As soon as I stop being freaked out over this." There was a hint of a smile in his voice there. "I love you. That haven't changed."
But... her words made him remember. "Oh that's right, shit, I have news too. Yer grandfather. He ain't dead. He's alive. And here apparently."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 05:42 PM
"Just have him chained up mo--"
Elaine stopped, took a deep breath, gave Jochy a disbelieving look. "He got shot," she pointed out. "He can't be alive still."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 05:44 PM
"I haven't seen him. Spider told me. But she and Andre seems convinced he's the real deal. He... I was prepared to give him the benefit of the doubt you know? That maybe he didn't drown in that whirlpool. But this time he was shot and... more and more I wonder if he didn't make some sort of deal. That ain't unheard of, but it never ends well."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 05:47 PM
Elaine went cold. She ran her hands up and down her arms, swallowing even as she nodded. "I love you," she said quietly.
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 05:49 PM
"I love you too. Hell... every time I speak to you I'm reminded why. Yer alright? I've got a piece of better news as well.. if yer in the mood."
Jochy's voice was so very soft and loving there.
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 05:55 PM
The girl nodded hastily. "Yes, please," she answered, sitting back up as she hugged herself. "I want good news. Please."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 05:58 PM
"Yer father will become a properly married man tonight. Spider finally agreed to marry him, and I think he doesn't want to wait a moment longer. They are so cute together. Was trying to help her wear a dress without looking like she's hiding in a potato sack earlier. Don't think I succeeded much. She's scared of her own boobs."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 06:02 PM
"She doesn't have boobs," Elaine pointed out helpfully, then smiled, a bit more confidently. "Are you going with them?" she asked. "To see the wedding? You'll-- I don't want to see my father's face if you tried to hug him, but hug Spider for me? If you get them a present from me, I'll pay you back for it when I see you," she offered. "Or get them something from us both if you like, and I'll pay half."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 06:07 PM
"I didn't think so either! Hell if I know where's she's been hiding them, or maybe it's the pregnancy." Jochy sounded rather disbelieving, this whole bit about carrying a child was a bit out of his experience. "Yeah, they need people as witnesses. That's why they barged in on me before, apparently they couldn't wait to tell the news." Jochy chuckled a bit, the tense tone of his voice finally having evaporated.
"Presents... oh hell, what are you supposed to give? I have no idea about how that sort of shit usually goes about. I just blackmailed Judes into doing it for me and Seth, and that was all for his benefit. I didn't know a thing... And I suck at buying presents it seems." Jochy laughed, then pondered... "Wait, I think I have an idea..."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 06:15 PM
Elaine smiled slightly. "I trust your judgment," she assured him. "Just make sure it's something for them, and not just for the baby. Spider never gets anything nice, and they're going to be spending all their money on that kid now."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 06:19 PM
"Elaine, yer stupid, you should never trust my judgment. Especially not when it comes to presents. Thought I'd proven that by now...." Jochy pondered quietly for a moment. "What do you think Spider might want since yer said that? I mean I can't imagine yer father doesn't try to give her everything as it is..."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 06:22 PM
"You think she lets him?" Elaine retorted, laughing. "Get them something nice and married-ish that they can use whether they're on land or back on the ship. Like down pillows," she suggested. "Or a nice lantern, or something."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 06:25 PM
"You mean the sensible presents I ain't supposed to give you?" Oh yeah, he'd never let her live that down.
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 06:31 PM
"You're not in love with Spider and Andre, dumbass!" Elaine retorted.
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 06:34 PM
"Well, the presents I'd like to give you doesn't really wrap up well..." Jochy smirked a bit, then cleared his throat. "Damn you woman, can't you even let me angst properly? You've got me feeling all good again."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 06:37 PM
"If you ever try to give me sex for my birthday," Elaine warned, "I'll kick you. I want jewelry and flowers and girly girly things. Sex is a given." She shot a dry smile at the ceiling. "Or it will be, by next year at least. If you play your cards right."
She grinned then. "D'you want me now?" she teased.
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 06:42 PM
"Girly girly things... check. I will remember that this time around. And... I do want to be there for your birthday next year. And the year after that... I don't want to lose this. I don't want to lose you." Oh how he adored that look on her face.
"And yes, you wicked wicked woman, I do want you now. You... probably have no idea how absolutely unique you are."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 06:48 PM
"Not that unique," she retorted. "I have got a twin. Don't let him get to you, will you?" she asked. "Just don't go near him, if he's chained up. And if you have to..."
She smiled slyly. "Keep a list. Keep a list of everything he says or does and whether he gets a rise out of you. Every time you keep your cool around him, and have it checked off on a list, I'll make sure you get rewarded."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 06:55 PM
"Oh you two are not even the least bit alike under that delicious surface. I like Si well enough, but no... I just don't get her. She's so very very... straight. Like an arrow. No mysteries. You... it feels I could be around you forever and still find out new things."
He chuckled a bit, forcing back the faint unease that threatened to creep back. "He was chained up when he went after me. He can get out of them with no effort, I don't know why the hell he's agreeing to go back into exile with his jailer. I just don't get it. He could have escaped at any moment... there must be something else behind it." He growled, shaking his head. "Are you serious? I... could do that I suppose." It was such an odd suggestion, but it also threw him out of the slightly panicked fear he always got when he thought about the man.
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 07:06 PM
"Of course I'm serious," Elaine answered. "If it'll help get you through the next month, I already owe you a present when you get here. I can just make it a bigger one."
She shot the air a wink. "And put more chains on him, if that's what it takes. I don't want him harrassing you. Of course there's something to it, he wants to go back to Refuge and finish out his seven years there. He's not interested in an escape, he's interested in a pardon."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 07:11 PM
"Guess I just can't understand people volunteering to go back into captivity. It's... no. Not even if I had to be on the run forever. Wouldn't do it." Jochy's voice was tight there for a moment, before he admitted "I'm going to have to confront him. I can't just go around being afraid of him. I need to know I can deal with being around him, without him getting power over me."
He sighed, but his voice was steady "Sometimes I wonder exactly how broken I really man, when I come up against things like this it's just... it's like I can't think straight."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 07:15 PM
"Everybody's broken, Jochy," Elaine answered, shaking her head. "We all have things that make us scared and weak. Just don't...stop thinking about him so much. The more you think about him, the more power he has. The more he spoils nice moments, the more power he has."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 07:19 PM
"Yeah, yer right. I've been told recently that I really need to get over some shit." The laugh was soft and self-mocking. "Been working on that. But that means going back and actually thinking about a whole mess of things I'd rather suppress you know? And try to come to terms with them. It's... hard."
He paused for a moment, then chuckled. "It was that little black clad bitch again, and one of her friends. They seem to fancy poking their noses into things that don't concern them. Yer had any run-ins with them recently?"
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 07:22 PM
Elaine blinked. "You mean Pipkin?" she asked. "Pipkin's here on the ship. She switched bodies with Ariel when the rest of us did. Or Miranda. Whatever we're supposed to call her."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 07:26 PM
"What? She... did what? Is that Ariel? That girl who never would shut up? Marcello's sister? Oh hell, yer might wanna tell... Pipkin was it? That Ariel is running around doing just the same shit that she was. I didn't know that was even possible!" He rolled his eyes, though that wasn't visible.
"She kept going on about how I'm letting what happened to me hinder me. My father." The disgust was heavy and dripping. "Apparently I'm stagnating."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 07:28 PM
Elaine laughed. "In more ways than one, then," she teased him. "I'll tell her, all right?" she answered. "But I wouldn't worry too much, seriously, Jochy. I mean, all she can do is talk at you."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 07:31 PM
Jochy was quiet for a few moments, then spoke with the utmost seriousness. "Words are the most powerful weapons ever. I... have been thinking about this. The worst bits aren't what He did, it's what he said. The way He constantly cut me down. Word for word. Honestly, I preferred my mother getting pissed at me, at least she'd just spank me and then it was over. Words stick with you longer than welts."
He had been thinking about this.
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 07:39 PM
Elaine put a hand to her forehead. "You know what? I keep trying to make this easier for you," she said softly. "I keep trying to give you outs. And you keep going back and trying to make yourself out like a victim. Suck it the fuck up for once, Jochy," she said frustratedly. "This isn't fair! Why do you always have to be hurt worse than everyone else?"
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 07:45 PM
That did shut Jochy up.
For a long moment. Long enough that it might seem that he wasn't even there anymore.
And then he spoke.
"I must be sounding bloody tiresome. And it ain't even true anymore. I don't hurt worse than everybody else. Honestly, up until today I was feeling bloody great. I... still do. That... ain't even me anymore. I'm sorry. Yer shouldn't have to deal with my whining."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 07:52 PM
"You are," Elaine replied. "And it's not that the rest of us don't let words get to us sometimes, but Jesus Christ, Jochy, you're a grown man. If somebody gives you a way out of being upset, you take it, you don't rationalize why they're wrong and why you should be upset. I don't want to hear about how messed up you are anymore. I don't want to hear about how broken you are or anything like that. She's right. You need to get the fuck over it already. Everyone's messed up. Once in a while we need to talk about it. Talking about that creep scaring you is fine. But it's like suddenly it didn't upset you as bad as you were hoping, or it didn't upset me as bad, so you've got to come up with other bad feelings to talk about. I don't want them anymore. This isn't just about being celibate; this is about growing the fuck up."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 07:59 PM
"Guess it's a bit like an alcoholic giving up drinking." Jochy spoke slowly, thoughtfully. "I'm used to doing that. Gives great excuses. I ain't used to being happy."
That made him chuckle faintly "I really ain't. But I am. And I am letting things go..." He pondered for a moment, then added "Growing the hell up. Spider asked me earlier today what I wanted in life? You know really wanted, for myself. That was... pretty much the gist I guess. Of everything I wanted. And you know? I'm gonna get there."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 08:06 PM
"What was?" Elaine asked. "Growing up?" She sighed deeply. "You don't have to be used to being happy. you just have to be happy about it. It's self-defeating to be unhappy about happiness. And it really doesn't bode well for the long term."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 08:14 PM
"Well, part of it. I was honestly settling for holding down a job, learning how to take orders and making friends. All of which I have managed. Listen..."
Jochy spoke softly now, all hesitation gone. "I know this is not fair to you. I know you ain't supposed to have to deal with things like this. If anything, I'm the one that's supposed to take care of you. I know I need to get used to actually keeping my big mouth shut for a moment instead of saying everything I feel right away, because the bad stuff? It goes away. Quick. There is no need to pull it out and examine it every bloody time. I know that now. I love you Elaine. That ain't going away any time soon. And I intend to be exactly the man you deserve. I want to be there for you, not just the other way around."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 08:29 PM
"Just stop talking about it and do it, then," Elaine said quietly. "Stop saying you want to be what I need and be it. Stop telling me how you've changed and show me. I am going to be the Sea Witch someday, Jochy. I need a man who can match that. I need you to not just be equal to what I am now, but I need you to be equal to what I will be someday. I don't need what ordinary girls need. I need you to protect me and support me and fight for me, yes, but not with houses and dresses and money. I need to know you'll fight like a raging animal for me and never lose control of yourself. I need you to be powerful; I need to be able to feel that power radiating from you when you touch me. You've seen Judith's head. I'm going to need you to ground me. You can't be a broken little boy whining about emotions and what your Papa did to you and how mean terrible men make you weak at the knees."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 08:36 PM
For a few moments there, Jochy was at a loss for words. Not because he was taken back by her request, not because he felt unsure, hesitant... but because right then and there he knew exactly why he loved her so.
"I don't think I've ever wanted you more than right now. Just felt you should know that."
She was right of course. Every word of it.
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 08:48 PM
The girl glanced up, a more soft expression now. "Good," she answered, "because I'm calling this all off. Not me-and-you, I'm still giving you your chance to prove yourself; I know you're trying. But I'm not making the rules. Me telling you that I'll fuck you when six months are up isn't going to prove that you've learned anything or changed anything except your willpower or your ability to lie. I'll still give you your reward for making it a month, but I'm not playing any more little power games with you. It's up to you. You tell me when you're ready, you can have me however you like. But you had better damn well be honest with yourself and really be ready."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 28 2008, 08:55 PM
Jochy nodded, then realized that she wouldn't see that. "Yeah. I think that's best. Could get seriously twisted there. And not in the fun way. In that vein..." He paused, trying to think of a way to phrase it "You know that bit I said about not minding if yer'd find someone else to fuck? That's just a lie. I would mind. A lot. I want you. And I'm gonna make damn sure you won't have reason to want anybody else."
Almost as if he had realized he sounded a bit too serious there, Jochy laughed. "But... when I'm ready... hell, when we both are. And this shit ain't no issue anymore. I'd still would love it if you made the rules now and again. Yer damn hot when yer bossy."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 28 2008, 09:33 PM
Elaine stiffened, a knot tightening in her stomach.
She sat straight up. "I'm sorry, but you don't get a day in that," she answered sharply. "I'm not going to be the kind of girl who settles for the first man she finds. You're already my first; you're not going to be my only. And I'm sorry that's poor luck for you, but you're going to have to settle for sharing me now if you want to keep me to yourself later."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 29 2008, 03:05 AM
"I know... oh hell, that came across all wrong." Jochy sounded utterly remorseful, embarking on an explanation. "Listen, Elaine. I would never dictate what you can and cannot do. I just won't. It's not my thing. And I ain't gonna give up over something like that, that ain't the issue. It's just that... I've been thinking about what I said to you that time. It was such a Seth thing, I don't want to be that passive-aggressive and push you into things. I don't want you not to think I don't value you. Or the ground you fucking walk on. Because I do. More than anything." His voice had gone quiet but intense now. "When... Seth told me he didn't mind me sleeping around, I... guess I lost a bit of respect for him. In the way he said it. It was like he didn't think he was good enough for me. Like he thought it was natural I would end up in bed with others. I... part of why I did it was because I wanted a reaction. Any reaction. That' he'd care. That he'd fight to keep me. Not just sit depressed in a corner waiting for me to come home. I just didn't want this to happen here, but I didn't know how to tell you. Because I knew you might be hurt."
He took a deep breath, then continued "I meant what I said the last time too. About not wanting to shut you in, or dictate your life. It's like you said, yer gonna be the sea-witch, we ain't gonna be joined at the hip all the time. Yer gonna have your life. I'm gonna have mine. I can share. It ain't that. I just wanted to get across that I didn't say that 'cause I was depressed or feeling like I wasn't worth anything or something like that. I fully intend to get to the point where you just don't want any other man 'cause they can't compare. But that's yer choice, not mine. And I won't mind the wait at all."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 29 2008, 10:15 AM
Elaine was tense, biting her lip, willing her eyes to make tears even though they stubbornly refused. "I don't want you to share me, either," she said helplessly. "I want to be--" she almost said 'yours,' but she didn't. "Someone's. I want to belong to someone completely. I want them to belong to me. I want to love and be loved so fiercely that it makes me stronger. I don't want love to make me weak or tear me down. But I need to know enough to know what that feels like, and I don't. And I don't mean this-- you know I don't mean this the way it sounds, but Jochy, you and I both know right now that you aren't good enough for me. Not unless you get things sorted. I'm not losing respect for you. I just need you to be something better than what you are, and I can't, can't, can't commit everything to you till I know you can be. I'm still-- I'm not giving up hope that you can."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 29 2008, 05:57 PM
"I know. And I am not taking it the wrong way, I'm agreeing with you. And I'm gonna. And you know what? It's going to be worth it. So utterly worth it."
Jochy was surprised at the calm he had found.
But since it was there, he wouldn't argue it.
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 29 2008, 06:11 PM
The girl grinned, then nodded. "All right," she agreed softly. "As long as you understand. I'm not trying to--I'm trying to uncomplicate things, not mess them up more."
Posted by: Jochy Melechen Jul 29 2008, 06:17 PM
"I think you managed to do that. I've got a lot to think about... which is usually the case every time I speak to you. You... take care alright? I've got wedding presents to buy. Can still make it if I hurry. You take care, alright? I love you."
Posted by: Niabheara ni Dowd Jul 29 2008, 06:25 PM
She blew him a kiss. "I love you, too," she answered. "Get them something good."